I’m not a lover of advice books – so many conflicting world views, all certain they’re right. Such absolutism is grating, but I have found one advice book which may help parents and children to communicate much better. I bought How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk (from Green Metropolis) because I’d read some really good reviews – and they were right. I was won over by the authors’ confession that they had tried not to write an advice book for all the reasons that I don’t like advice books.
That, the fact that I realised I was denying my daughter’s feelings in just the way they describe – “Put your coat on you must be cold”, “I’m not cold!”, “You must be, it’s freezing out here…”, and the instant improvement when I acknowledged that my four-year-old’s feelings were her own make me want to recommend this book to all parents. (I’d like to stress, I’ve always told my daughter that her opinions are valid even if they’re different to mine – shame I hadn’t already stretched this to cover her feelings.)
So buy this for yourself, or for a friend and improve the quality of life in your household for good.